I finally stop procrastinate and get my blackberry plan activated. I’m blogging from my blackberry now. Pretty cool since my mind ponder the most when I’m traveling.
I’m on the bus back home from my Amanda’s grandma wake.
Recently I have been thinking of this theory that I heard before from someone but not sure who.
Everyone that is around your life is either a plus or minus energy carrier. Let’s say if you hang out with a person that is a plus energy in your life, you will energize end of the day even though u maybe doing tiring stuff.
But for a minus energy person, you will feel worn out and tired even though you may be doing something that is fun.
So in life we must always notice people around, whether are they a plus or a minus. We shouldn’t be hanging out too often with the minus. Of course, sometimes it’s necessary. Just don’t do it too often.
I’m surprise and know that I have reach another stage of emotional maturity when I received a call from a friend today. An unexpected call as we never talk on the phone before. What was even more shockingly was that he asked me a pretty sensitively and personal question. And my stand and thought about it. To my surprise I’m able to say straight from my heart what I felt and thought without feeling any awkwardness.
Growing up in a Asian family, we are taught to keep opinions and feelings to ourselves. Many times people like to express their feeling in a non-verbal form. Cold war, sarcastic tone. We somehow believe that people around us have super mind reading power and are all expert in body language and tone analyzing.
Why can’t people just be truthful about what they feel instead of speaking in a maze?
After my run, I lie down at the parade square of my neighborhood park and started admiring the limited stars of Singapore bright skyline. I felt a moment of peacefulness and started remembering about the night I was in New Zealand doing my navigation exercise a year ago.
I was surrounded with darkness. It was so dark that I can’t even see my own hands. But it’s because of this very reason, I saw the most beautiful sky in my whole life. The sky was filled with stars that is beyond my imagination. It’s like sands on the playground pit. I can’t even recognized any constellation. I was overwhelmed by it.
It was at this moment that I learned one of the greatest lesson in my life.
Even though the sky was beautiful, deep in my heart I felt empty. I asked myself what was the point of seeing the nicest sky yet without my love one around. I had a revelation. It’s who and not where and what that is important. It’s not the most beautiful place on earth, or the biggest house or the fastest car that will make one happy. But who you shared these things with that matter.
It’s not possession that brings you happiness but relationship. Yes, possession can enhance a relationship but it’s only the icing, not the main part of a dish.
The content of my blog is getting lamer and to a certain extend superficial. But I find it an obstacle to pour my heart out in this blog when I don’t know who actually read my blog. Yes, there are not a lot of people that visit my blog everyday. I’m not interesting neither do I have a pretty face. So I’m fine with not having a huge volume of people visiting my site. But there are still a big amount of people that know this url especially when I started to link it from my twitter account.
I always believe that how much I should share about my life is determine by how close I am to you. I’m not prefect and I don’t intend to make myself seem like one but that doesn’t mean that I need to tell the whole world about my wrongdoing.
Back to my main point, this blog is originally created to improve my writing. I always admire people that write beautiful and effortlessly. And practise make perfect. But now it came to a point that I am unable to write freely and felt pressure to draft an interesting and well-written essay before publishing it.
I decided that as much as I will try to write personal stuff about myself over here but most of the stuff will be interest driven rather than everyday life.